Category: Transition

So to Thursday, a quick call to Hamish to see if he needed anything, a call to the electrician to see when the quote would be done then some research as to the shower, screen and other stuff needed for the wet area of the shed but not until I had been to see My osteopath as my neck and back were bad when I got up. Annette was the first link in the chain as far as I am concerned and I told her as much, she looked shocked when I told her of my plans, I don’t think she quite put two and two together until I told her I would be changing my name to Stephanie! She was shocked when I told her I was going to Philadelphia for the surgery but understood my reasoning, she asked why Stephanie and when I told her I think she felt sorry for me, I don’t want that, I want people to know what a good life I have had in the circumstances and that I have no regrets. When it came time to leave she gave me a big hug and told me to keep in touch and keep my bitterness about my parents in check and not to let it get on top of me, more to the point, if it does start to overwhelm me then to see her for some help in dealing with it which I very much appreciated.

Continue reading “A long weekend of food, fun and sharing my news”

Let’s talk about the weekend!, starting with Friday which started with a lovely Skype conversation with my very good friend in Melbourne, Rita was my district sales manager for Holden when I worked at Fennessys and we became great friends, she introduced me to isagenix and after leaving the motor trade in 2015 we met up in Prague during her and our European tour which was excellent and a highlight of 2015. Rita told us about her new partner, I am so pleased for her, she deserves some love and affection, I resisted telling her about Stephanie at this stage as I didn’t want to steal her limelight but will tell her soon after Christmas, I just know she will be supportive. Next up came a visit to Linny’s beauty spot for my monthly pedicure, one of my real pleasures in life and I’m thrilled with my toe nails which are painted in “Funtime fuchsia” and then a coat of glitter!!.
The biggest event on Friday was my Skype call with The surgeon in Philadelphia who is going to make my life complete by carrying out my gender reassignment surgery, I chose This one for a number of reasons including the fact that she is female, had great reviews and most of all that she has her own recovery rooms in her house.

The Skype was all I hoped it would be, I took to her straight away, she was kind, helpful and gave me all the information I needed and I booked the surgery there and then, the only downside is that the earliest time she can fit me in is 30th may 2017, in many ways it works well but it seems a long time to wait!.
I went to bed with a feeling of thankful excitement, excited that I have an end date for Robin and a birthdate for Stephanie although I intend to spend more and more time as Stephanie as time goes on, it gives me so much satisfaction and pure enjoyment.
Saturday morning was a time to reflect on the consultation then into town to do some shopping then the beginning of a food fest! High tea with Jessie, the other love of my life and daughter of my piano teacher the dinner with Linny and Andy from next door but one, lovely people and the lady who does my pedicure, I had no thoughts of telling Andy, Linny already knows but it just seemed right somehow and he was amazing, very supportive and genuinely interested.

So today’s highlight was using a ladies toilet for the first time! I was at Nannup working on the shed and needed to go! Normally I would have just done the business in a secluded place on the block and buried it but today, as I was dressed only in a vest top and shorts I decided I could pass with relative ease, particularly in Nannup so got in the car and drove to the toilets in town, there was a car waiting out side as I pulled in and two ladies just coming out of the toilet so as they were getting tin the car I got out, walked past their car and headed for the ladies, i felt comfortable, confident and pleased with myself!. Coming out I passed a lady going in and in my best “head” voice said hello and she replied and didn’t seem to give me a second glance. It’s strange, such a small thing but it meant so much!
Tomorrow is a massive day, Skype with Rita at 8, pedicure with Linny at 11 and the highlight will hopefully be booking my surgery during my Skype consultation with the surgeon in Philadelphia at 10 pm, I’m so looking forward to getting something booked, hopefully she can do it on my birthday! Stephanie’s birthday!.

Today has been an unusual day, wasn’t very motivated when I got up and changed plans several times before deciding what to do, eventually decided to go into town to do some shopping, get some things for breakfast on Sunday with the Pilpel family, Denise wanted to visit a shoe shop to get some sandals for summer, eventually buying two pairs for $342 which seemed an awful lot for what they were! Then a visit to muffin break for a coffee and I couldn’t resist a muffin of course, best one I’ve had in ages! Cranberry and almond! Followed by some girly shopping in jeanswest and rockmans for Denise and then rivers for me, first time I have openly tried on women’s shoes in Busselton showing my painted toes! Denise was so far out of her comfort zone it was amazing! I ended up buying 2 pairs for $70 and a $5 voucher for next time, I love them! Just wish I could wear them in public!. Spent the rest of the day doing jobs around the house and garden while Denise did her book work, had a wonderful dinner of New Zealand salmon then watched “the danish girl” very thought provoking to say the least, I wouldn’t have picked the ending at all, it made us both cry but there were so many parts of it which hit the spot with me in terms of the problems transgender people have to face, in this case there were lots of differences to me and it was set 90 years ago when the world was a very different place but all the references to being trapped in the wrong body, dressing up in secret, pushing the boundaries as to what you can get away with and the sheer pleasure of being the person inside not the person on the outside who everyone sees were so real to me. The biggest difference to my case was that lily wanted a relationship with a man whereas I still want to be with Denise and have absolutely no desire to date a man.
The biggest thing to come out of it for me was how hard it is for the partner, in my case we will still be together but Denise is going to have to get used to living with another woman instead of a man and being labelled a lesbian which will be difficult for some to accept, it absolutely brought home to me how lucky I am to have her in my life and to have her support as I couldn’t do it without her.
I missed a very special event of the day, a visit to spotlight to get a pattern and some fabric for Denise to make a dress for me!!! Had a lovely time choosing them both with the help of a very kind sales assistant!. Also in our Skype conversation with mum, Denise actually told her that the dress was for me, now that is a lot for an 86 year old to take in! But as usual she was her wonderfully accepting self and didn’t seem confused or concerned about it, she is one in a million and I love her dearly, I so with that I had had even a quarter of the relationship with my own mother that I have with Doreen, things may have been so different!.